


idiot bitch dirk strider is sad

by strider



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Child Neglect, Gen, this is my own depression shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 05:34:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14372016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strider/pseuds/strider
Summary: i only write vent fix





	idiot bitch dirk strider is sad

Your stomachs flipping softly, throat choking some more when he tells you through the phone he won’t be home AGAIN. You don’t cry anymore when he’s not back at midnight and shrugging a jacket onto the back of the couch but today for some reason- the universe hates you, probably, more than anything- it’s getting you. It’s gnawing at your brain. It’s only 6 and you’ve been thinking of it all day. You think you’re hitting a rock bottom for you as of late, thinking too much about being left alone. Fuck your brain.  
Tears start falling in tiny drips off your chin as silently as you can manage and you grip the counter top as hard as you can.  
“Dirk? I gotta go in a sec. Eat dinner soon ok? I swear I left you something- shit. Bye dude.”  
“Bye, Dave.”  
Anxiously jabbing at the end call button before you let out a choked whimper, your knuckles on the side of the counter turning white. He’s basically your dad and you can’t bring yourselves to call each other anything but first names aside from an ironic Mr. Strider that hardly feels like a joke nowadays considering the way he pays for your life is like that of him paying a worker below minimum wage. You suppose your house is far far far above any living wage citizen’s, but the way he feeds you feels that way.  
Maybe you’re just reading too much into it because he’s been away for over a week now and nobody has visited you. He still checks on you. You kind of hate it when he calls you, though. His voice is sickening at this point. If you’re not gonna be around often why not just go away forever, bro?  
You don’t mean that, though.  
Where would you even be if he didn’t come home at least once a month? Not starving, you guess, you have enough credit cards he leaves around to order pizza, no matter how anxiety inducing it is to make those delivery calls you do what you have to.  
You have messages and messages from Roxy sitting on your computer and damn you if you’ll ever go talk to your sister when you need her. Slumping into the stool at your kitchen island your head smacks into your arms pathetically, your phone sliding all the way across the granite counter. Shivering, you sob and sob into your skin.  
He’s so stupid, wherever is he. You love him just as much as you did when you were small and you long for him to come home and be your stupid brother or parent or whatever the fuck. Stupid stupid and stupid. You’re so scared he doesn’t want you anymore. You know in your heart of hearts that Rose really probably loves Roxy more than she could ever love you, of course she does, since you’re not like a together family. Dave loves his job. Dave loves Rose and he loves Roxy and he loves his job and he loves to buy trashy headphones he accidentally leaves home that you pick apart for the shit inside them. He loves travelling and he loves writing and you love him.  
You fall asleep on the couch again with a blanket you stole from his bed. It’s creepy, maybe, but what else do you fucking do. You don’t even get to see his face in person.  
Maybe tomorrow.


End file.
